ELLEN THE TALL ONE

March Flies of the Mornington Peninsula, Victoria

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Way down south of mainland Australia,

Squinting in vain to see neighbouring Tasmania.

Panoramic views of raw rock, gold sand,

Taper away into a blinding horizon.

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Though it’s not always idyllic,

Courtesy of Bass Strait comes big swell.

And tyrannical rips that’ll drag you to drowning peril.

Heck! Here is where Harold Holt made his impromptu farewell.

His body never recovered…

A Prime Ministerial death accidental…

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But, tides and tribulations aside,

What’s really irksome are the February March flies!

Like torpedoes piercing the air,

They dart with precision; too nimble to ensnare.

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It’s the females, the bloodsuckers,

Slashing my skin with their serrated, scimitar blades.

Then suckling my blood and voila!

In turn more eggs sinfully get laid.

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Their cycle perpetuates;

An exasperating existence.

They’re drawn to movement and CO₂;

Futilely I endeavour to keep my distance.

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By the seashore my toes barely tread-

I’m bailed up at beached seaweed

By a brigade of biting flies,

Striking bare limbs in high-speed blitzkrieg.

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Stricken with panic,

Arms flail faster.

Antagonized, the flies rile up then-

OUCH! A serene dip turned disaster.

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Here in lies the Mornington dilemma:

Unoccupied, picturesque beaches and bays

Beguiling from afar,

Until the startling Tabanidae* finale!

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It’ll have your entire body in a flurry,

You’ll scramble in a red-faced hurry,

Fleeing the assiduous March fly insanity

To catch your breath, then keep searching for serenity.

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*Tabanidae :: the scientific name of a very large family of the Diptera order comprising the horseflies, whose females suck blood and sometimes transmit disease (as loaiasis) to human beings.